I would like to add my grandmother. She was at times really strange (raised a Christian but refused to eat pork until a year before she died) but she was always there and always someone I could count on. Growing up my mother never really had a car of her own so when we had to be somewhere like a doctor's appointment or an emergency stop to the hospital, my grandma was always there to take us. She was a good woman in life but the part that troubles me the most are her last few years on Earth. Often when I was between places to stay, be it my mother or my friends, I could always stay with my grandma. In mid 2004 I was here in Missouri and I used to get letters from my grandma every so often. I didn't hear from her in awhile, I knew she was sick and wasn't able to check her mail and had to have someone else to do so. I tried calling her but her phone had been busy for days on end. Worried, I got money and went back to see her. She said she was doing okay but was often tired (she was 82 at the time). About a week later I noticed she was really weak and I grew concerned and my brother called for an ambulance. They said she flat lined a few times on the way to the hospital but they had to put her into a medical-induced coma to help her recover. I later learned she had two different types of pnemonia. She had to stay at the hospital for almost three weeks before she was stable enough to be moved to a nursing home where she said until I was able to get her home on Christmas Eve. One day mid 2005 she was laying on her bed just waking up and I brought her a cup of tea which she always liked. As I walked into her room she was on her bed laying on her back she looked at me and asked, "Why is it taking so long for me to die?" I thought it was a bit strange she asked me that so I went down to the nursing home where my mom was at (she obtained bed sores under my brother's care and they became infected) and my mom used her cell phone and talked to my grandma. She told my mom that as soon as my mom got out of there she could die in peace. My mom said what if I stay in here? And my grandma said, don't do that to me!

One day in April 06 I brought her a cup of water and her pills for her to take. I handed her cup and she took it in her left hand which I thought was unusual because she always took a cup with her right hand as she was right handed. She gave me this look like a curious child as what she was suppose to do with it. I asked her if she could take the cup and she bearly said yes. I sat the cup down to help her sit up and as she sat up I moved my hand and she fell backwards onto her pillow and she laughed like it was the greatest thing she ever did. Getting more worried I called my mom and told her what happened and she said it was probably because my grandma was hungry and needed to eat before fully waking up. My mom wanted me to give her oatmeal, grandma's favorite breakfast, but something told me not to. I opened some yogurt and fed it to her but she could bearly swallow it. I set the yogurt down on her nightstand and she looked at me like what now. I told her I was going to call the paramedics and she said okay. They came and hooked her up to a resperator moniter and asked her a series of questions and asked me what medications she was taking. The lead paramedic said he wasn't 100% sure but believed she may've had a stroke. When she had got out of the hospital in '05 the doctor told us she needed to take a blood thining medicine (coumadin) but she took herself off it so she could eat salads (which revereses the effects of coumadin). I tried giving her her coumadin when I wasn't looking she would spit it back out. (she did the same thing when she was in the nursing home) She kept telling her doctor that she wanted to eat salads but he never got back to her on how to adjust the medication so she took herself off.
Anyways we found a place for me, her, my mom, and my brother to live at and I got my grandma home from the hospital the day before my birthday. As I left the nursing home with her, her nose started running like it never had before. I contacted the nursing home and they said it was normal. A few days after she got home she wass looking a little pasty and we called the paramedics again they came and got her and we went to go visit her a few days later. They said when they brought her in, she had an irregular heartbeat (a history of that for her so that came as no surprise) of 200 beats per minute. They said they finally got it down to about 130bpm and if they could elevate her bloodpressure a bit and keep it there for a week they said she could go home. As we left the hospital (my mom had to get home or risk reopening her bed wounds) I looked at her as she laid on the hospital bed, one eye closed and the other half closed, a tear running down her cheek. I said I love you grandma and she bearly nodded her head once and tried to say it back. :( I finally fell asleep around 12:30 in the morning and around 1:30 I had got a call on my cell phone from the hospital saying she had passed away a few moments before. :crying: I went into the living room where my mom slept and she's normally a sound sleeper but when I had said mom she woke up right away and I had told her the news.

Later in the day I was looking at the calendar when it hit me, she had passed away one week exactally after my birthday. :(

Later that month me, my mom, brother, my mom's bestfriend and her daughter, my grandma's best friend of 50 years and my grandma's only granddaughter and her family all got together at my grandma's favorite restaraunt and had a dinner/wake in her memory.

I made a post here about my grandma but it vanished. The main board said I made the last post here but I don't see it.

Nevermind. Soon as I made this post my previous one reappeared.

This post has been edited by Kilrai_wolf on Jun 23 2008, 09:40 PM

http://www.rockymountainnews.com/news/2008...he-underground/


Goodbye Eddie. We all loved you, and still do. You meant so much to all of us, evident in that the church your funeral has held in was not big enough to hold everyone, and many stood out in the lobby to hear your service.

We still don't know exactly what happened, or why, but know this: We will never forget you.

RIP Eddie Bennett 1982-2008

To my grandmother

Little girl don't you forget her face
Laughing away your tears
When she was the one who felt all the pain

Little girl never forget her eyes
Keep them alive inside
I promise to try -- it's not the same

Keep your head held high -- ride like the wind
Never look behind, life isn't fair
That's what you said, so I try not to care

Little girl don't run away so fast
I think you forgot to kiss -- kiss her goodbye

Will she see me cry when I stumble and fall
Does she hear my voice in the night when I call
Wipe away all your tears, it's gonna be all right

I fought to be so strong, I guess you knew
I was afraid you'd go away, too

Little girl you've got to forget the past
And learn to forgive me
I promise to try -- but it feels like a lie

Don't let memory play games with your mind
She's a faded smile frozen in time
I'm still hanging on -- but I'm doing it wrong
Can't kiss her goodbye -- but I promise to try

For my sweet Rebecca. Though you were only with us 5 hours, the love that filled the room will never die. Rest well my little one, you are in a far better place.....I miss you everyday.

Daddy

For my father who passed away late last year... November 5, 2007.

It's difficult because we didn't spend as much time together as we should have. I miss you dearly, and only wish that I would have come down for Halloween. We were only fifteen minutes away but I had thought that it was too late in the evening to drop by. I should have come by to say hello, and if I'd have known what was to happen just a week later, I would have. The world is full of would have's and should have's. I still think about you each and every day, and I wonder how much better your little boy's life would have been with you around. I know that it will make him that much stronger once he's my age, and being my little brother, I'll try to visit him and your wife as often as possible. I don't call them enough, and I've been disconnected from everything lately.
The good news about me is that I'm getting healthier and smarter each day. I wish you were here to see what I'm growing into, how my life is blossoming. I wish I could give you one last hug and tell you how much you've influenced my life. I'm trying so hard, and I've been doing quite well, but I can't shake the want for alcohol and drugs to numb the pain. True, I've been strong enough to keep away from them, but I don't know how much longer this strength will last.
The thing is, there's nobody that I can talk to about you. There's nobody willing to listen without changing the subject. I thought that I could talk to John, but it doesn't seem to matter to him. The conversation always spirals into something stupid about him.
I miss the fact that you were the only one who knew so much about me. You were the only one that actually KNEW about my involvement in this lifestyle. You never said anything about it, but you knew. I miss knowing that you'd be there no matter what, and that I'd always have a roof over my head and a hot meal once I'd come to see you. Any memory I have of you makes me cry, even the happy ones - because I know that I don't have an opportunity to make any more memories with you.
As I stare at these white walls, so plain but so clean, I can't help but wonder if there is a heaven and hell. You never did like the fact that I wasn't involved in the same religion as you, but still, you accepted me. I resent your ex for making me believe so many years that you wanted nothing to do with me. At least before you left this earth, you made sure that I knew that you cared.

Thanks, daddy, for lending a shoulder when I needed it, for listening to my problems and my bitchings about my mother, your ex, and just for being there. I love you, and your memory will never be forgotten.

Rest In Peace
DJL
1944 - 2007

to Givusxerectus: my heart and prayers go out to my friend..I can relate to some of the things you said, I too didn't have the relationship with my dad I should have had(we were to much alike) we clashed alot when we were together. and our religion didn't mesh together (I'm spiritial not religious), and yes I too have a drug problem(but I've been clean for over a year now)..and it's hard not to listen to that naging in the back of your hear that it would sure be good to go hide in a good high. all I have to say is be strong love, there's others here that will listen, I have broad shoulders for you to lean on if you need someone to be there.(even tho I'm way out here in the mojave desert Ca. my dad passed away last year also in Aug, and I spent the 1yr. mark in the hospital when I should have been here with my mom. I was in the hospital for 3 1/2 weeks haveing surgery done on my feet. and I went through a hard time then. but I worked it out, with a lot of faith in friends and others around you I know you can do it also.. so be strong and if you ever need to talk please contact me here, or PM. me.. take care and be safe..horny in so cal.. :wub: :kiss: :kiss: :heart: :angel:

Im gonna use this to post this here..

I think we should all use this thread also to commemorate the tragic losses of the 9/11 attacks 7 years ago. Today is the anniversary of the tragic day

We will never forget

This is for the memory of my grandfather. He passed away a week ago at the age of 85 after a long struggle with declining kidney function. He had been on dialysis for nearly a year, and it was getting harder and harder each time for him. He had just moved in an assisted living facility with my grandmother this past April and all things considered, he seemed to be doing so well...then his blood pressure dropped so low that dialysis became ineffective. They had to discontinue treatment and basically let him be slowly poisoned to death.

And now he's gone. :crying: My grandmother is now in a place that is not her home and suddenly without her best friend of 61 years. She's very tough, but I can't help fearing that this may be the beginning of the end for her. I only hope I have more than just a few days or weeks left with her....up until 2 weeks ago, I thought I had at least a few more months or even years with Pa, and in the blink of an eye, that time span became 3 days.

The last 2 days, he couldn't even speak...the waste buildup in his body had basically put him in a coma. Between work and the rest of my extroverted family being with him, I couldn't get a private word in edgewise. I know that he knew I loved him after 28 years together, but why couldn't he have HEARD me say it in his last moments? :zipped: I had to leave at noon on what was his last day, and he passed about 4 hours later. I guess a small part of him stil knew I was there, and he didn't want me to see him die...my mother and aunt were the only ones there.

I know his last moments were painless, and he's in a much better place now, so that helps tremendously. But my God, does it ever hurt. I guess I'll just have to keep his memories with me. Rest in peace, Pa. You were more than a grandfather...you nearly raised me as a child. You were like a second father to me, a great example, and a friend like no other. See you on the other side.

March 22, 1923 - September 5, 2008

This is for my dad.
I received a phone call from my sister at 12.30 am this morning to tell me that my father had passed away in his sleep.
He had been fighting both heart disease and cancer for the last year and finally succumbed to the conditions. He was everything that was wanted in a parent.He was a best friend,a great teacher,an excellent provider and was one of the kindest people that I have ever had the pleasure of knowing.
Rest In Peace Dad
June 2 1924-October 9 2008

Bullet so sorry for Your loss ~ his battle is finally over

:(

*hugs n kisses always** You know where i am if You want me

Bullet

The Sheps sorry 2 read of the loss of your dad......after a year of fighting he passed away in his sleep...I dont know what to say my friend, except your Dad is now at peace


your in my thots my Friend, if you need me for anything...just contact me



:friends: :friends:

Bullet :crying: I feel for your loss. It may be painful now, but remember he's now in a better place. His spirit & memory will always be alive and living through you, the family, and those who loved him. :friends: Hugs :friends:

Huggles :heart:

This post has been edited by SunFlower23 on Oct 11 2008, 06:49 PM

Just a real quick goodbye.
R.I.P. to my grandma who passed away this weekend.
A language barrier kept me from knowing you better but I will miss you.
I wish I could have gotten to know you best, but we will meet again someday.
:heart:

This post has been edited by bootylover on Oct 12 2008, 06:08 AM

Attached Image ( Click on thumbnail to view full size image )

*hugs* * crying* I am sorry for your loss!!! :(